Sometimes its brutal trying to be nice.
Dealing with someone manipulative, who wants everything and then a little more. People forced to be within 4 feet of each other, yelling at each other. Making fun of one another.
Always the peacekeeper, I try to walk the fine line between supportive and firm.
Ship them out, treat and street. They leave to come back another day, with the same wants, the same needs, the same demands. “But they ALWAYS give me TWO sandwiches. But they ALWAYS give me three rolls of medical tape. But can’t you just give me a COUPLE ace bandages?” And why on earth do you need this stuff anyway? I want to scream it, but its that firm yet supportive smile, with a no and a shake of the head.
Yes, go ahead, take the leaflet from housekeeping. God knows what you need it for but go ahead and yes, two sandwiches if it makes you actually leave the room an hour after I discharged you.
And to turn around and find another person, a friend, being threatened by one of her patients. Security swarms and the police eventually show up a couple hours later. Meanwhile, the perp is gone, laughing all the way.
How do you maintain the professionalism when they just suck you dry?
There’s that phrase again…’compassion fatigue’.
Yet I go back, we go back, time and time again. Sure it pays the bills. But it’s more than that.
Maybe next time we are faced with the wants, the needs, the demands…maybe that will be the time we actually fix something for a change.
So what if you were, say, dying…the end of the road was visible.
What if you had regrets? What if you had things you wanted to do that you hadn’t done.
Of course you’d try to do them, right?
I mean, within bounds, provided it didn’t hasten the dying.
Everyone has a dying wish, or so I’ve heard.
So what, then, if your last wish…your dying wish… the one thing you’ve always wanted to do…what if that one thing was hurtful to someone else?
Would you do it?
I don’t mean kill someone, or maim or otherwise physically harm someone.
But what if something you did..that you did because you have always wanted to do it and it’s literally now or never…what if that something would make someone else sad?
Would you do it, knowing that you wouldn’t have to be around to clean up the mess?
Would you do it, knowing that it was something you’re literally at this point dying to do?
Would you not do it, sacrificing your happiness for that of another?
Would you do it if no-one would ever know?
Then say you found out you weren’t dying, but you’d already done it.
And loved it.
Would you do it again?
I think it really is true that the unknown is worse than the known.
If you can see what casts the shadow,
you can at least adjust the angle of the light.
Too many lurking variables
without enough random chance (to steal a phrase).
And where am I left but surfing the net
looking for answers without any proof
and hoping for miracles just in case its true.
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