The D Spot

Here I am back again, with you.
Yes you. You know who you are.
I realized today that I am never alone. I feel you there. I imagine you in the car next to me, walking beside me as I push the cart in the grocery store. Sometimes I think I hear you , whispering just out of the range of my hearing.
I am drawn to you, and I have yet to see your face. I put other people’s faces where yours belongs, and sometimes the fit is close…but not exact.
Who is it that sings me to sleep at night, when the house is quiet and still?
Who is it now, standing just over my shoulder and behind me, watching me type these questioning words.
And what I don’t understand is that, if you are with me all the time, guiding and guarding me…why can’t I ever feel your presence when I am in the dark times? Why do you not come then, when I am alone with my frustrations, my lonliness, my tears? Are you truly that fickle?
What is a guide when the seeker is lost? What is the purpose of being with me, all the time, close but untouchable? Sometimes I long to find a friend yet my arms reach out into nothingness.
I feel like I am searching and looking and trying to scrabble my way on my path and I am not alone. No, for I have you.
Or better put, you have me.
I just wish I knew who you are.